How to Date as a New Single Parent

How to Date as a New Single Parent

Dating was never easy, but having a baby at home and trying to navigate co-parenting and feeding times doesn’t make it any easier. Still, this doesn’t mean you should wait for your bundle of joy to turn 18.

Meeting new people who may turn into romantic interests can be fun. If nothing else, it’s a nice break from parenting (provided the baby is safe at home). It may not be as easy as “Hey, I’ll see you tonight after work!” but with a bit of planning and support, you can make it work.

If you’re new to this, here are a few steps to make sure things go smoothly.

Update Your Dating Profile (Be Honest)

This is something you can do while the baby is sleeping or during a walk. You no longer have the time to browse through all sorts of profiles, so be blunt about what you can offer and what you expect.

Start with the fact that you’re a new parent who is caring for a baby. Give a short description of the situation with the other parent, and be upfront with the fact that your time is limited. You may not get as many hits as before, but it will help you connect with people who are genuinely open to dating a parent.

Give interested people a glimpse into your life. Tell them about your parenting responsibilities, but don’t forget to talk about your interests and hobbies. Babies are fun and all, but no date will want to spend more than 10 minutes admiring photos and videos of your little ones.

Finally, state your intentions clearly. Are you looking for a long-term relationship or just casual companionship? Do you want a few fun outings, or are you ready to pursue something more stable?

Talk It Out with the Co-Parent

Going on dates while still seeing your ex, with whom you have a child, can be awkward, but you have the right to rebuild your life. So, don’t ask for permission; just inform them and be aware of their reaction.

If you’re lucky enough to find someone reliable and want the baby to meet them, talk with your parenting partner first. It’s their right to know who enters the baby’s life. But until this happens, it’s best to treat co-parenting and dating as two separate entities.

Make sure to discuss your parenting styles and expectations with any new partner early on. Make it clear that you are the parent and that discipline is your responsibility. The right person will understand and respect that your child’s well-being is your top priority.

Find the Right Support System

Ideally, you would have a parent, a sibling, or a person you trust watch the baby while you’re out. If this isn’t a good option, look into babysitting options. It may be more expensive, but it’s a way to get a few hours per week for yourself.

When you’re a new single parent, these small breaks matter for morale and peace of mind. Speaking of peace of mind, make sure the sitter has everything they need, including emergency contacts, allergy info, and breastmilk or formula.

If you go with formula, consider a version like Kendamil Infant organic formula. It’s made with whole milk fats, certified organic ingredients, and free from palm oil or added sugars, which makes it closer in composition to breast milk and gentler on your baby’s digestion.

These steps may look like they have nothing to do with the date itself, but when you know the baby is safe and well taken care of, you can relax and enjoy yourself. So, work hard to build your support system first, and enjoy dating a bit later.

Protect Your Energy

You’re a new parent, you’ve been through a separation, and you’re trying to find your footing. Now isn’t the time to jump headfirst into dating. Start small. Focus on getting to know people online and only meet the ones that show true promise.

Also, don’t feel guilty about wanting adult connection and romance — having a child doesn’t mean you stop deserving companionship. Be kind to yourself and embrace this new and chaotic way of life.

Wrap Up

Your baby’s needs will always take first place in your life, but your well-being matters too. A fulfilled, happy parent often has more emotional energy to give. So, enjoy being a parent, but don’t give up on meeting someone to share that experience with.

 

 

 

Dating was never easy, but having a baby at home and trying to navigate co-parenting and feeding times doesn’t make it any easier. Still, this doesn’t mean you should wait for your bundle of joy to turn 18. Meeting new people who may turn into romantic interests can be fun. If nothing else, it’s a […]


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Author: Guest Author

How A Man Should Deal With A Pregnancy Scare

How A Man Should Deal With A Pregnancy Scare

There are many joys of being in a loving relationship. Regular laughter, smiles and sex are just to name a few of them. Although, when you experience the irregular things, it’s not as joyous–in fact, it’s downright scary.

There are two words put together that will scare any man and last weekend I heard them: “I’m late.”

When a guy hears those two little words, he wants to run, cry, scream and throw up especially if he is not ready to be a father.

When my girfriend dropped the bomb on me, I tried to stay calm, tried to say all the right things, but I when I opened my mouth.

Since both of us are not as financially stable as we should be at our ages (due to the fact that we live in a city that no longer has a middle class) and the fact that we’re old enough to be parents, (even if we both don’t want to be right now) we’ve never been so scared before in our lives.

The next few hours were a blur of emotions, however we handled it accordingly and if you’re a guy in a similar situation like this, here are some guidelines to get through it:

Keep Her The F*ck Away From The Computer!

Don’t ever let your girlfriend type up symptoms on the computer. She will not only scare the living shit out of herself but she will do the same to you as well.  My girlfriend went from thinking she was pregnant to thinking she had ovarian cancer in less than two minutes just because her breasts weren’t sore.  (I’m not even f*cking joking.)  So, if you’re having a pregnancy scare, stay away from the computer because only a pregnancy test will give you the answer you need.

Don’t Try To Have Sex With Her

Not that you’re going to be particularly horny anyway because hearing “I’m late” will automatically make you temporarily impotent, but if you are trying to distract yourself from the situation through sex, she will not be having it–AT ALL.

Don’t Play The Blame Game

It’s easy to get mad at each other during a pregnancy scare. Even though you might want to scream at the top of your lungs, “How the f*ck aren’t you on birth control already?” or “Why did you ride me so hard that the condom literally burned rubber?”–DON’T.  Let’s face it: You both screwed up and pointing fingers is not going to make the situation any easier.

Spend The Day With One Another

Although you must be thinking that taking a pregnancy test should be the first thing on this list, I will tell you why it’s not.  What if your girlfriend really is pregnant? The second you see that positive sign, your relationship immediately changes and it won’t ever be the same again regardless if you decide to keep the baby or not.  That is why you should take the day off and do all the fun things you can think of before you eventually have to take the test. I took my girlfriend to Centre Island in Toronto and we rode the Scrambler, walked around, ate ice cream and spent the night on Ward Beach where I built a fire for us.  It was an incredible night and this reassured her that no matter what the test results were going to be, that I was going to be by her side through it all.

Now You Can Take The Pregnancy Test

After you had a great day with one another, wake up and have her take the test.  Morning pee is apparently the strongest to detect the pregnancy hormone and you shouldn’t delay it any further.  Don’t let her take it alone. You have every right to be there by her side–unless of course she doesn’t want you to watch her pee on a stick.  In that case, just wait on the couch until she opens the door.

So the test came up ‘negative.’  I’m not going to lie, we partied like it was 1999 and in a weird way, the whole experience made us stronger as a couple.  We now know that we need to be more responsible when it comes to birth control (especially since we’re not ready to be parents) and even though we don’t want to be parents yet, we’re starting to think about moving in together. 

Maybe I’m not ready to be a father–but I think I am definitely ready to take “baby steps” to being the man who will be ready in the future.

There are many joys of being in a loving relationship. Regular laughter, smiles and sex are just to name a few of them. Although, when you experience the irregular things, it’s not as joyous–in fact, it’s downright scary. There are two words put together that will scare any man and last weekend I heard them: […]


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Author: Andrew Tch